The other day I was working on a contract and I kept going round and round and round
nothing was right – I wasn’t making any progress and my day was almost over.
I followed all the rules; got some fresh air, went for a walk, then a run and then did some yoga – that always brings clarity. But no – not this time.
I was starting to panic this had to be done before Monday. I kept asking myself – why can’t I do this – all I have to do is write down what I want to happen – why am I finding it so difficult?
Then it dawned on me… I was all consumed by anticipating a negative response and was focusing on how to ensure it was received well and signed. The funny thing I was… there was no reason to anticipate a negative response, it was a fair contract, it was a contract that if someone asked me to sign I would.
So I started again and asked myself
- What exactly do I want – The contract
- Where could I compromise and still be satisfied – The negotiables, to pull out if necessary
- If asked to compromise in other areas what would it “cost” me – The big picture reflection
- Would the compromises be worth the inner conflict – Questions for my conscience
- Would it be okay to lose the contract based on what is important to me – Knowing opportunities are in abundance if you are open to them
This little excise gave me space to see… by focusing on trying to make everyone happy I was simply sending a confusing message to myself and to others.
I then started to wonder how to apply this lesson to leadership and it was simple if you don’t know what you want how can you lead or influence others to help you achieve it – it is simple you can’t.